Helping a Daughter Cope with a Mother's Alzheimer's Disease

When Mary began to show signs of memory loss, her daughter tried to arrange for medical evaluation and home care support. Mary had always been argumentative and fiercely independent, and she refused anyone's help. She was rapidly losing weight, mismanaging her medications, and occasionally losing her way on familiar bus routes.

Our care manager began visiting regularly, coordinating medical appointments and follow-up. Eventually Mary was persuaded to accept a live-in caregiver. As her dementia progressed, the care manager helped her daughter to select a high quality group home for Alzheimer's patients, where Mary lived an active and happy life. Here is what her daughter wrote:

"Words cannot begin to express how grateful I have been for your support over the past 4 years. I still remember the day we met…you calmly assessed the situation and helped me establish some stability over a situation that was beginning to spiral out of control. Having a trained second set of eyes and ears during the times of difficult decision-making was a tremendous source of comfort."

Choosing Care for an Aging Father and Disabled Sister

Several brothers and sisters struggled to decide what to do about their aging father and mentally retarded sister, who lived together in the family home. Although the father's memory loss made him unable to continue caring for his daughter, he adamantly refused to stop driving or to accept any help in the home.

Our RN care manager evaluated the father and daughter and was immediately concerned for their safety. Despite the father's objections, the care manager managed to stop him from driving, retain a part-time caregiver, and set up a system for dispensing medication correctly.

In a family meeting with the care manager, the siblings were able to agree on a plan. The care manager provided education and advice to enable the family to make some difficult choices. Father and daughter are now happy and doing well in the home of one of the adult children in another state, and supportive community services are available where needed.

A grateful daughter wrote:

" Your expertise and wonderful sense of humor were appreciated many times during a very difficult few months…Your expert advice helped us make some very difficult decisions regarding my Dad and sister. They are both settled nicely in their new living quarters. "

Caring for Alice: an Isolated and Troubled Senior

An elderly, sick, and cognitively impaired woman with no immediate family had been moved by the County from her dilapidated home to an assisted living community. Our Associate care manager visited weekly for several years, serving as Alice's advocate and advising the attorney who managed her affairs. We coordinated her medical care, purchased her clothing and toiletries, celebrated her birthdays, and arranged for private duty helpers when needed.

When the client was hospitalized, our RN care manager intervened to ensure good care, and was instrumental in bringing the client home to the Assisted Living with hospice care when the end of her life was near.

After she passed away, a friend from church sent this note:

"The nurse care manager and her associate were warm, caring and loving in their approach ...They provided many little extras that added to the quality of life for my friend. "

Care for a Patient with Parkinson's Disease

A gentleman with Parkinson's had continued to work part-time and lived independently with occasional financial assistance from his sister. When the store where he had worked for 15 years closed down, he suddenly deteriorated both physically and mentally. We received a call from the sister and her husband on the day they were leaving town to return to their own home in another state. Our MSW care manager met with them that afternoon, and helped to resolve the immediate problems, including obtaining prescription medications and preventing imminent cancellation of the client's health insurance.

The care manager continued to visit, accompanying the patient to doctor's appointments and helping to adjust his medications. Legal referrals assisted his sister in making appropriate financial and legal arrangements. The client lived independently and happily with care management support until we helped him to move to an Assisted Living home near his daughter and grandchildren in another part of the country.

The sister wrote a letter of thanks:

"In a situation that was sad and frightening and quite frankly seemed very hopeless… with us living far away and our relative in Maryland, we can't even begin to imagine what these few years would have been like without Debra Levy Eldercare Associates. "

Member of The National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers